As described in section 11.11.B of the BIFFUD Corporate Bylaws I hereby invoke my rights as a sentient being who has not uploaded their mind to the cloud for consideration of this project application by the BIFFUD Hive Mind. With this application I submit my interest in becoming a Member of BIFFUD and having this project supported and adored by all who can 🤔.
Project Information
Project Name: Zenmo
Project Haiku:
My vow to you is
I will pay my debts in full
When the sun burns out
Project Analogy: Zeno's Paradox + Venmo = Zenmo
Project Description
An abbreviated strawman history of transactions:
100 million years ago - i dunno, no money probably just dinosaur things
10 million years ago - still no money, speed this up
5000 years ago - Commodity money where the money itself has immediate perceived value (lame)
4000 years ago - Standarized coins (proto-bitcoins)
1000 years ago - Banknotes (bitpaper)
500 years ago - federalized banking
200 years ago - Construction of the Erie Canal begins
50 years ago - free floating fiat currencies
25 years ago - online banking
15 years ago - Paypal founded
8 years ago - Venmo founded, Bitcoin introduced
NOW - ZENMO
The history of interpersonal transactions has inexoriably moved towards faster, easier methods of settling debts. This has only accelerated with the integration of the internet and increases in computing power. However, this has left a massive opportunity - how can we provide slower, more frustrating, technically inaccurate, borderline unusable transactions to those who need them. Enter Zenmo.
To settle a debt, Zenmo first takes an equivalent amount in a cryptocurrency. Next, our algorithms split that value up into hundreds or even thousands of pieces. These pieces are distributed nonuniformly to encourage random intermittent reinforcement to maximize the amount of time engaged in the transaction. Then, these amounts are recorded into paper wallets which the receiving party must check individually to receive the full debt owed. Given the underlying volatility and non-stationarity of cryptocurrencies, by the time this transaction is completed the debt will almost assuredly not be paid to the correct amount. However, the debt should probabilistically be less than it was previously (though possibly have changed hands). To complete the debt, the debtor and debtee will switch back and forth until rounding errors occur or the debt is too small to be worth the hassle. As cryptocurrencies inexplicably have miniscule discretized values, any debt could continue to be Zenmo'd back and forth for years.
Zenmo: Pay your debts. Eventually.
Bylaw Questions
How is this project a bad idea?
Oh holy shit, lemme count the ways:
It dips BIFFUD's toes into the blockchain waters right after a rather dramatic drop of the value of crytocurrencies which makes this really terrible timing
Debts genuinely may never get settled. Haven't done the math yet, but depending on the number of pieces + smallest unit of cryptocurrency, it could potentially take anywhere from decades to millenia.
Huge waste of paper if somebody decided to actually print the dang wallets out
Transaction fees probably?
Can we call it Zenmo?
why
If this project were a D&D Character, what alignment would it be and why?
Alignment:
[ ] [Chaotic Good]
[ ] [Neutral Good]
[x] [Chaotic Neutral] (at best)
Where are the lulz?
I am betatesting this with my dues for becoming a Corporate Overlord
Why pay with a wheelbarrow of pennies when you can Zenmo?
How does this project make people thinking face emoji?
🤔
From the outset, my intention of this awful awful idea is to poke at a few well proffered beliefs: technological innovation is a monotonic force for good; cryptocurrencies are immune to failings that exist with other transfers of money; all interpersonal transactions must be quantified and exact; all debts must be settled as soon as capable; minimizing transactional friction is always desirable; electronic transfers are to be trusted fully, etc etc. A later version of Zenmo could expand on these ideas by building a mobile game and/or literal slot machine to receive your payment.
Who is involved?
Name: Ian Anderson
Twitter: @senorinfinito
Github ID: ijanderso
Skillz: Product / Math
Project role / expectations: Project Tsar/Zsar
Project stake: 100%
and any betatesters who want to contribute in maximizing Zenmo's potential.
Who will be the project's Comptroller?
Ian Anderson
Is this realistic to implement via BIFFUD?
Yeah, it's largely just some automation of API calls with JS + Python plus some math.
Next Steps
Please attend the next scheduled BIFFUD plotting session to plead your case.
This issue will be updated with application status and next steps.
BIFFUD Project Application
As described in section 11.11.B of the BIFFUD Corporate Bylaws I hereby invoke my rights as a sentient being who has not uploaded their mind to the cloud for consideration of this project application by the BIFFUD Hive Mind. With this application I submit my interest in becoming a Member of BIFFUD and having this project supported and adored by all who can 🤔.
Project Information
Project Description
An abbreviated strawman history of transactions: 100 million years ago - i dunno, no money probably just dinosaur things 10 million years ago - still no money, speed this up 5000 years ago - Commodity money where the money itself has immediate perceived value (lame) 4000 years ago - Standarized coins (proto-bitcoins) 1000 years ago - Banknotes (bitpaper) 500 years ago - federalized banking 200 years ago - Construction of the Erie Canal begins 50 years ago - free floating fiat currencies 25 years ago - online banking 15 years ago - Paypal founded 8 years ago - Venmo founded, Bitcoin introduced NOW - ZENMO
The history of interpersonal transactions has inexoriably moved towards faster, easier methods of settling debts. This has only accelerated with the integration of the internet and increases in computing power. However, this has left a massive opportunity - how can we provide slower, more frustrating, technically inaccurate, borderline unusable transactions to those who need them. Enter Zenmo.
To settle a debt, Zenmo first takes an equivalent amount in a cryptocurrency. Next, our algorithms split that value up into hundreds or even thousands of pieces. These pieces are distributed nonuniformly to encourage random intermittent reinforcement to maximize the amount of time engaged in the transaction. Then, these amounts are recorded into paper wallets which the receiving party must check individually to receive the full debt owed. Given the underlying volatility and non-stationarity of cryptocurrencies, by the time this transaction is completed the debt will almost assuredly not be paid to the correct amount. However, the debt should probabilistically be less than it was previously (though possibly have changed hands). To complete the debt, the debtor and debtee will switch back and forth until rounding errors occur or the debt is too small to be worth the hassle. As cryptocurrencies inexplicably have miniscule discretized values, any debt could continue to be Zenmo'd back and forth for years.
Zenmo: Pay your debts. Eventually.
Bylaw Questions
How is this project a bad idea?
Oh holy shit, lemme count the ways:
If this project were a D&D Character, what alignment would it be and why?
Alignment:
Where are the lulz?
How does this project make people thinking face emoji?
🤔
From the outset, my intention of this awful awful idea is to poke at a few well proffered beliefs: technological innovation is a monotonic force for good; cryptocurrencies are immune to failings that exist with other transfers of money; all interpersonal transactions must be quantified and exact; all debts must be settled as soon as capable; minimizing transactional friction is always desirable; electronic transfers are to be trusted fully, etc etc. A later version of Zenmo could expand on these ideas by building a mobile game and/or literal slot machine to receive your payment.
Who is involved?
and any betatesters who want to contribute in maximizing Zenmo's potential.
Who will be the project's Comptroller?
Ian Anderson
Is this realistic to implement via BIFFUD?
Yeah, it's largely just some automation of API calls with JS + Python plus some math.
Next Steps
Please attend the next scheduled BIFFUD plotting session to plead your case. This issue will be updated with application status and next steps.