• Central text: Good idea to have a landing page that explains the concept, but the text should be use a more sober tone and especially English language that non-English speakers can understand. In particular:
o “What’s all the fuss…” preferably something more like: Citadel for Open Data
o “Citadel is an Open Data project” This is the first time you mention that citadel is a project and might confuse the user.
o “held by public authorities or public companies” this statement is not in line with Citadel, which is about engaging citizens, uploading bridge club datasets, working with citizen developers. Some of the key concepts behind the project and the conception of Open Data need to be better explained here (contribution forthcoming)
o “Locked away from public view”: it’s more that access is denied to the public
o “Where should I open data?” Presumably you mean here “Where and how should I publish my datasets?”
o “Out project makes it easy…” we have to decide whether we’re talking about the Citadel project or the Citadel platform and then be consistent throughout.
o “open your data is (in) simple, useful ways” isn’t very exact, maybe “open your data simply in a way that is useful to others.”
o “break the bank” is too English jargon, the rest of the paragraph wanders
o ‘Open Data Journey’? should not have a question mark
o ‘your data situation’ is vague: how about ‘how far you’ve progressed with Open Data”?
o ‘let our website do the rest…” please no unfounded promises
• Central text: Good idea to have a landing page that explains the concept, but the text should be use a more sober tone and especially English language that non-English speakers can understand. In particular: o “What’s all the fuss…” preferably something more like: Citadel for Open Data o “Citadel is an Open Data project” This is the first time you mention that citadel is a project and might confuse the user. o “held by public authorities or public companies” this statement is not in line with Citadel, which is about engaging citizens, uploading bridge club datasets, working with citizen developers. Some of the key concepts behind the project and the conception of Open Data need to be better explained here (contribution forthcoming) o “Locked away from public view”: it’s more that access is denied to the public o “Where should I open data?” Presumably you mean here “Where and how should I publish my datasets?” o “Out project makes it easy…” we have to decide whether we’re talking about the Citadel project or the Citadel platform and then be consistent throughout. o “open your data is (in) simple, useful ways” isn’t very exact, maybe “open your data simply in a way that is useful to others.” o “break the bank” is too English jargon, the rest of the paragraph wanders o ‘Open Data Journey’? should not have a question mark o ‘your data situation’ is vague: how about ‘how far you’ve progressed with Open Data”? o ‘let our website do the rest…” please no unfounded promises