Fix a problem with order of notifications and proactive canceling

[jimsch]

• Also put in some more code dealing with unit tests and put in a small set of observe tests
• Move the observe counter back to private non-static so that the tests are happy. There was no specific comment why I changed this to start with.
• Move reconnect and cancel variables for observe into the observe relation structure
• Add ability to update the etags on an observe relationship
• Allow for observe to be canceled when doing a reconnect.
• Change the message pump so that the full stack with a Mock Channel can be used. Just changes the network into the message pump.