add update functionality to create_ methods

[anhqle]

Summary

Add the ability to update_if_exists to create_X methods

Questions

It seems that a Source node can't update its catalog, schema, or table. code. If that's true then there's the client Source's UpdateNode is incorrect

Test Plan

• [ ] PR has an associated issue: #
• [x] make check passes
• [x] make test shows 100% unit test coverage

Deployment Plan

[anhqle]

• #1001 👈
• main

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[anhqle]

Merge activity

• May 20, 12:58 PM EDT: Graphite couldn't merge this PR because it had conflicts with the trunk branch.

[anhqle]

Just came back from vacation, merged :)