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DefenderOfBasic / in-good-faith-handbook

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Relevant defender tweets #1

Open DefenderOfBasic opened 2 months ago

DefenderOfBasic commented 2 months ago

How to change anybody's mind about anything

(I've learned this has a name! Dennett 4-step magic:

Talk to the observers of the argument, not the other guy

I wish people arguing on Twitter remembered that 100x more people read the exchange than the people involved in it.

Don't say: "you're dumb, not worth arguing with". Just explain why they're wrong. It doesn't matter if they won't get it. Address the audience, not them https://x.com/DefenderOfBasic/status/1765358970284183659

this helps diffuse anger + spreads your message more effectively. Basically, imagine a small impressionable child is reading your tweets (this is most likely true, either literally, or an impressionable adult). They will believe whatever argument makes more sense. What do you want to leave them with?

Internet arguments are a game where you win by understandnig

the reason I've never lost an Internet argument is because I understand there is a bronze, silver, and gold medal

🥇convince the other guy 🥈get the other guy to understand you 🥉 understand the other guy

I always go for 🥉first https://x.com/DefenderOfBasic/status/1825523348216152136

It's not you vs them, it's both you in search for the truth

You're both on the same side! you always are, you have to be. That's what you do when you engage in a discussion with anyone. If you were here to attack them, just get it over with.

But that's not what you're here for. You're here because you think the other guy is spreading false/dangerous information. Why would he be doing that? Most of the time: because he genuinely believes it!!!

Your ideal goal is to (1) change their mind, but it'd be great if you (2) convince the bystanders reading this, who are on the fence. Additionally, you should (3) seek to understand. The better you understand what you hate, the more equipped you are to fight it. If you don't understand why so many people are duped by something that seems obviously false to you, then you don't understand the thing you're fighting, and you are failing.

Swap roles

TODO: find the tweet where tyleralterman does this, where he goes, "let's argue each other's points!" i think that's brilliant, hearing the other side articulate what they think you're saying

People aren't objecting to truth, they're objecting to their misunderstanding of truth

Smart people, please take note of this pattern.

  1. You tell someone truth X
  2. They say it's not true
  3. You think they're an idiot, you tell them so
  4. They get angry / block you

You don't understand what they're saying. they think you said Y, and Y is NOT true!!!!

https://x.com/DefenderOfBasic/status/1842295130633437502

DefenderOfBasic commented 2 months ago

General principles

DefenderOfBasic commented 1 month ago

Someone from HN recommended: https://streetepistemology.com/

DefenderOfBasic commented 1 month ago

How Minds Change: The Surprising Science of Belief, Opinion, and Persuasion Hardcover – June 21, 2022

Recommended by @tonyaajjackson and Ben Danielson

Have you read McRaney’s “How Minds Change”? Fun book that brings you on the author’s journey/exploration of what actually changes somebody’s mind. A bit lopsided at times, but some fantastic nuggets in there.

https://x.com/BensCuriosity/status/1842263041167233378

DefenderOfBasic commented 3 weeks ago

How would you summarize this principle? I think it's about, "handing your enemy a solution" rather than just pushing them away?

Fresh relationship cheat codes just dropped:

Start a fight: "Why don't you see me!?" End a fight: "How do you want to be seen right now?"

Works on every OS I've tried so far: romance, business, family, self. Haven't tried on pets. Holler if you find a place these don't work.

from abstract fairy: https://x.com/AbstractFairy/status/1844410127283257835