late, formal early modern English to modern English converter

[willf]

This is my idea:

Use OpenAI's DaVinci model to convert from a formal text to a modern English version. Often translations from Greek or Latin done in the late 1800s and early 1900s seem very "stuffy". Can OpenAI convert this for me?

I'm currently reading Tertullian's Against Praxeas, and I will use this as my source.

[willf]

Early results

from The Italian (1797), Ann Radcliffe. no editing but linebreaks.

About the year 1764, some English travellers in Italy, during one of their excursions in the environs of Naples, happened to stop before the portico of the Santa Maria del Pianto, a church belonging to a very ancient convent of the order of the Black Penitents. The magnificence of this portico, though impaired by time, excited so much admiration, that the travellers were curious to survey the structure to which it belonged, and with this intention they ascended the marble steps that led to it.

Conversion to Modern English. no editing but linebreaks.

Around 1764, some English travelers in Italy were touring the area around Naples when they came across the portico of the Santa Maria del Pianto, a church belonging to a very old convent of the order of the Black Penitents. The magnificent portico, though damaged by time, excited so much admiration that the travelers were curious to see the structure it belonged to. They ascended the marble steps leading to it.

[willf]

From Romeo and Juliet

O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name. Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love And I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

Converted

O Romeo, where are you? Deny your father and reject your last name. Or if you won't do that, swear that you love me and I'll stop being a Capulet.

[ikarth]

Poetry is clearly going to be the hardest (though possibly the funniest) source text for this.

[willf]

The Adventures of Peregrine Pickle, Volume I

by Tobias Smollett

Converted version, but I had to add in places in which the naive textwrap algorithm broke things, and manually replace the paragraphs. I don't think I can use OpenAI to do sentence and para-breaking!

Chapter 1

In a county in England, bordered by the sea on one side and 100 miles from the nearest big city, lived Gamaliel Pickle, Esq. He was the father of the hero whose story we're going to tell. He was the son of a merchant in London who, like Rome, had started small and risen to great prominence and acquired a fortune. But his father died before he'd made as much money as he wanted to, and he left his son a request to work hard and follow his example until he'd made up the difference, which was less than 15,000 pounds.

This request motivated his son, who did everything he could to make his father proud. But despite his best efforts, he didn't succeed; after 15 years in business, he was no closer to his goal. He was five thousand pounds worse off than when he first took possession of his father's effects; a circumstance that affected him so closely, that he lost interest in business and decided to retire to some place where he could spend his time grieving over his misfortune, and, by being thrifty, make sure he would not end up in poverty or in jail, which his imagination was haunted by constantly. He was often heard to express his fear of becoming a burden on the parish; and to bless God that, because he had been a housekeeper for so long, he was entitled to that support. In short, his talents were not naturally active, and there was a sort of inconsistency in his character; for, even though he had as much desire to save money as any other citizen could have, he was hindered by a certain laziness and sluggishness that took precedence over every other consideration, and even kept him from taking advantage of the fact that he had no other responsibilities and was moderate in Appetites which have often led to acquiring great wealth; qualities which he had in a very remarkable way. It's probable that nature mixed very little or nothing flammable in his composition; or whatever seeds of excess she might have sown within him, were effectively stifled and destroyed by the austerity of his education.

The outbursts of his youth, far from being excessive or criminal, never exceeded the bounds of that decent jollity which an extraordinary pot, on extraordinary occasions, might be supposed to have produced in a club of sedate bookkeepers, whose imaginations were neither very warm nor luxuriant. Little subject to refined sensations, he was scarcely ever disturbed by violent emotions of any kind. The passion of love never interrupted his tranquility; and if, as Mr. Creech says, after Horace, "Not to admire is all the art I know; To make men happy, and to keep them so,"

Mr. Pickle was undoubtedly possessed of that invaluable secret; at least, he was never known to betray the faintest symptom of transport, except one evening at the club, where he observed, with some demonstrations of vivacity, that he had dined upon a delicate loin of veal.

Notwithstanding this appearance of phlegm, he could not help feeling his disappointments in trade; and upon the failure of a certain underwriter, by which he lost five hundred pounds, declared his design of quitting business, and retiring to the country. In this resolution he was comforted and encouraged by his only sister, Mrs. Grizzle, who had managed his family since the death of his father, and was now in the thirtieth year of her maidenhood, with a fortune of five thousand pounds, and a large stock of economy and devotion.

These qualifications, one would think, might have been the means of abridging the term of her celibacy, as she never expressed any aversion to wedlock; but, it seems, she was too delicate in her choice, to find a mate to her inclination. I can't imagine she went so long without being asked, even though her looks weren't that great and her personality wasn't all that pleasant. She was really pale (not to mention sallow), and she had this cast in her eyes that was really off-putting. And her mouth was so big that no amount of effort could make it look normal. On top of all that, she was kind of pious in a resentful way, which didn't do anything to lessen her haughty attitude and the way she liked to brag about her family's importance, which, by the way, couldn't be traced back more than two generations.

It was like she'd forgotten everything she knew before her dad became sheriff, and the only thing she cared about was when her dad was mayor. No, this good lady was so concerned for the support and propagation of the family name, that she actually persuaded her brother to overcome his own disposition and declare a passion for the person he later married, as we will see later. Indeed, she was the motivation that spurred him on in all his extraordinary undertakings; and I question whether he would have been able to break away from the life he had long been living if she hadn't constantly urged him to. London, she observed, was full of wickedness, where an honest, unsuspecting man was in danger of being tricked and cheated every day; where innocence was constantly tempted, and virtue always persecuted by malice and slander; where everything was ruled by caprice and corruption, and merit was always discouraged and despised. This last "imputation" she pronounced with such emphasis and annoyance, as plainly showed how much she considered herself an example of what she was saying; and really, the charge was justified by the way her female friends interpreted her decision to leave, who, far from thinking it was for the admirable motives she claimed, insinuated, in sarcastic commendations, that she had good reason to be dissatisfied with a place where she had been so overlooked; and that it was certainly her wisest course to make her last effort in the country, where, in all probability, her talents would be less eclipsed, and her fortune more attractive.

Be that as it may, her admonitions, though they were powerful enough to convince, would have been insufficient to overcome the laziness and inertia of her brother, had she not reinforced her arguments by calling into question the creditworthiness of two or three merchants with whom he was doing business.

Alarmed at these hints of intelligence, he exerted himself. He withdrew his money from trade, invested it in bank stocks and bonds, and moved to a house his father had built near the seaside to pursue a different line of business.

So at age 36, Mr. Pickle settled down in the country, where he was met with plenty of people who, because of his fortune, vied for his acquaintance. Though just the hassle of receiving and returning these courtesies was an intolerable fatigue to a man of his habits and disposition. He therefore left the care of the ceremonial to his sister, who indulged herself in all the pride of formality; while he himself, having made a discovery of a tavern in the neighborhood, went there every evening and enjoyed his pipe and can; being very well satisfied with the behavior of the landlord, whose communicative temper was a great comfort to his own taciturnity; for he shunned all superfluity of speech, as much as he avoided any other unnecessary expense.

[willf]

Ok, here it is: https://github.com/willf/nanogenmo-2022 alpha version