Correction in the French version

[freedomfighterforiran]

Hello, I asked a French native speaker to give his opinion about the French version of the website. He said there are a few grammatical errors that need to be fixed. Also, he gave some general comments. I list all of them here:

• "[C'était une Iranienne de 22 ans qui est décédée après avoir été arrêtée] pour ne pas avoir porté le hijab approprié." = for not wearing the appropriate hijab. is this what is meant? or not worn the hijab in an appropriate way instead?
• "pourquoi nous manifesterions aujourd'hui" is "why we would protest today", not sure it's the intended tense
• "Le gouvernement iranien tente de réprimer les manifestations, tirant à balles réelles sur les manifestants, déployant des gaz lacrymogènes et des canons à eau et bloquant l'accès à Internet" -> "Le gouvernement iranien tente de réprimer les manifestations, en tirant à balles réelles sur les manifestants, en déployant des gaz lacrymogènes et des canons à eau et en bloquant l'accès à Internet -> the first draft is correct, but adding 'en' makes it better imo
• "le droit de choisir comment elles s'habillent" is featured twice in the list
• [Le droit de demander le divorce] et d'être de pouvoir avoir la garde de ses enfants -> remove d'être
• TLe droit de quitter son pays sans l'autorisation de son mari -> remove t
• also, minor but there is a switch between 'ils' and 'elles', maybe it's intended, and in that case ok, but from a pure grammar nazi perspective it's not perfect

Hope that helps. once you applied the comments let me know to read it again for the final corrections

[syavash]

Thanks! Will ask the team to fix these.

[khaled9z]

@freedomfighterforiran It would be ideal if your French native speaker friend can give us suggested fixes, so that the development team can apply them to the website. Here are responses to each of your points:

1. "[C'était une Iranienne de 22 ans qui est décédée après avoir été arrêtée] pour ne pas avoir porté le hijab approprié." = for not wearing the appropriate hijab. is this what is meant? or not worn the hijab in an appropriate way instead?
   • In this case, I think the English version is also incorrect: for not wearing a proper hijab.. I think what we actually want to say is for not wearing her hijab properly. I will update this in English first, then the other languages, including French.
2. "pourquoi nous manifesterions aujourd'hui" is "why we would protest today", not sure it's the intended tense
   • In English, the sentence is "Why are people protesting?. I think this is close enough to the English. If your French speaking friend thinks otherwise, please let us know, and we can adjust the French sentence.
3. "Le gouvernement iranien tente de réprimer les manifestations, tirant à balles réelles sur les manifestants, déployant des gaz lacrymogènes et des canons à eau et bloquant l'accès à Internet" -> "Le gouvernement iranien tente de réprimer les manifestations, en tirant à balles réelles sur les manifestants, en déployant des gaz lacrymogènes et des canons à eau et en bloquant l'accès à Internet -> the first draft is correct, but adding 'en' makes it better imo
   • Will apply this change.
4. "le droit de choisir comment elles s'habillent" is featured twice in the list
   • Will remove repeated feature
5. [Le droit de demander le divorce] et d'être de pouvoir avoir la garde de ses enfants -> remove d'être
   • Will do
6. TLe droit de quitter son pays sans l'autorisation de son mari -> remove t
   • Will do
7. also, minor but there is a switch between 'ils' and 'elles', maybe it's intended, and in that case ok, but from a pure grammar nazi perspective it's not perfect
   • I will try to find examples of this, but if you have specific examples of this, please let us know and we'll fix them.

[khaled9z]

My bad, looks like several of the above items were already fixed by @syavash in https://github.com/forkbombz/WeAreMahsaAmini-Homepage/commit/8e2f45594c61f80986c92cdc310eff69ebc49840.

The only remaining items from the above list are items 1. & 2.

@freedomfighterforiran If you can provide us more info on item 2. as explained above, it would help us move forward on it. Thanks!

Beyond that, Looks like we can close this ticket.