Remove and rewrite repeated sentences (when re-used throughout the page)
Make a bit more formal, removing many of the personal pronouns ("you") and other informalities (such as "e.g." and "3 easy steps" and exclamation points)
Make a bit more specific, by including actual names of HIPAA security controls/safeguards and including section numbers from the HIPAA spec. This will also help with SEO
Improve flow by moving parts/sentences (for example, a former H3 became the page subtitle, and vice versa.
Fix all typos
Add links to signup/Gridiron and others where relevant
Wherever possible, shorten the page
Please note I purposely decided not to modify the structure or styles of the page so we would not have to revisit design. I also sought to maintain the spirit of what Thomas captured in the version of the copy he created.
@fancyremarker I'd love for you to review when you have a chance to ensure I didn't miss any of the changes you had expected. I think publishing this page will provide a huge upgrade to our product marketing footprint. I think we could work on content forever, and at this point it seems that we have, so I'm anxious to publish ASAP. Down the road I'd like to iterate on and expand this page a bit, but we have to walk before we can run.
My goals here:
Please note I purposely decided not to modify the structure or styles of the page so we would not have to revisit design. I also sought to maintain the spirit of what Thomas captured in the version of the copy he created.
@fancyremarker I'd love for you to review when you have a chance to ensure I didn't miss any of the changes you had expected. I think publishing this page will provide a huge upgrade to our product marketing footprint. I think we could work on content forever, and at this point it seems that we have, so I'm anxious to publish ASAP. Down the road I'd like to iterate on and expand this page a bit, but we have to walk before we can run.