feat: configurable update strategy

[jessesimpson36]

Which problem does the PR fix?

2035

2026

What's in this PR?

This PR makes the update strategy for each deployment/statefulset configurable for both 8.5 and alpha. This also changes the default optimize strategy to Recreate because there is a risk that 2 optimize migration processes may run at the same time.

Checklist

Please make sure to follow our Contributing Guide.

Before opening the PR:

• [x] In the repo's root dir, run make go.update-golden-only.
• [x] There is no other open pull request for the same update/change.
• [x] Tests for charts are added (if needed).
• [ ] In-repo documentation are updated (if needed).

After opening the PR:

• [x] Did you sign our CLA (Contributor License Agreement)? It will show once you open the PR.
• [ ] Did all checks/tests pass in the PR?

[jessesimpson36]

I think the test failure is an issue with zeebe upgrades and not related to this PR. I'm unsure though. Otherwise, I think this PR is ready.