ietf-wg-idr / draft-ietf-idr-bgp-ct

1 stars 2 forks source link

2nd WG LC - Shepherd's report: G4-xx items - Editorial Edits for Appendices #65

Closed suehares closed 8 months ago

suehares commented 9 months ago

G4- Appendix edits

G4-01 - Section B, paragraph 3 - Does text say what you want?

Old text:/ In Intra-AS and Inter-AS option A, option B scenarios, AFI/SAFI 1/76 may not be used, but the Transport Class and Resolution Scheme mechanisms are used to provide service mapping./

Comment: I know this was put into address Keyur's comment. Does this say what you want?

G4-02: Section B.1.2 - paragraph 2

Question: In the past, you used "Transport Class ID". Do you want that style of capitlization form here?

G4-03: Section B.2.1, paragraph 1 - need "AS1 and AS2" plus "AS3 and AS4"

Old text:/ This example in Figure 14 shows two provider network Autonomous systems AS1, AS2. They serve L3VPN customers AS3, AS4 respectively./ New text:/ This example in Figure 14 shows two provider network Autonomous systems AS1 and AS2. They serve L3VPN customers AS3 and AS4, respectively./

G4-05, Section B.3.3, paragraphs 5 and 6 remove commas

Old text:/ The RD:203.0.113.41 route is readvertised in AFI/SAFI 1/128 by PE22 with next hop self (192.0.2.22) and label V-L1, to RR23 with the Mapping Community Color:0:100 attached./

New text:/The RD:203.0.113.41 route is readvertised in AFI/SAFI 1/128 by PE22 with next hop self (192.0.2.22) and label V-L1 to RR23 with the Mapping Community Color:0:100 attached. /

Old text:/
Next, ASBR21 readvertises the RD:203.0.113.41 route with next hop self to ASBR12, with a newly allocated MPLS label, V-L2./ New text:/ Next, ASBR21 readvertises the RD:203.0.113.41 route with next hop self to ASBR12 with a newly allocated MPLS label V-L2./

G4-06, Section B.3.3 paragraph 8 - replace comma with "and".

Old text:/ Traffic traverses as IP packet on the following legs: CE31-PE11, PE21-CE41. And uses MPLS forwarding on ASBR11-ASBR21 link, and inside AS1, AS2 core. / New text:/ Traffic traverses as IP packet on the following legs: CE31-PE11 and PE21-CE41. And uses MPLS forwarding on ASBR11-ASBR21 link, and inside AS1 and AS2 core./

G4-07, Section C - paragraph 8, sentence 1 - break into 2 parts for emphasis

Old text:/ This is a more pragmatic approach, rather than abandoning time tested design pattern like RFC 4364 and RFC 8277, just to invent something completely new that is not backward compatible with existing deployments. /

New text:/ This is a more pragmatic approach. Rather than abandoning time-tested design pattern similar to RFC 4364 and RFC 8277, just to invent something completely new that is not backward compatible with existing deployments. /

suehares commented 8 months ago

Closing after discussion with authors and reviewing the diff between version -26 and -27.