New Chapter: Creating Teams that Aren't Afraid to Fail

[semioticrobotic]

This is a proposed chapter from Catherine Louis.

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A finished version of this chapter was published at Opensource.com as "A 4-step plan for creating teams that aren't afraid to fail."

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Paula Dickerson is proofing.

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• Page 26, paragraph 3: Should it be "shortage" instead of "short", or is there a word/phrase missing?
• Page 27, numbered list, item 2: The fun exclamation point is back.
• Page 27, numbered list, item 3: The final question is technically correct. However, most people don't write (and definitely not speak) that way, so I usually find myself bending the rules and would go with "What's the quality issue you need help with...".
• Page 27, second full paragraph: This one falls into design funny so it's hard to tell where paragraphs begin and end. I don't know if there's anything you can or want to do about it.
• Page 27, second full paragraph, block quote: Since the goal is treated as if it were a block quote, are the quotation marks necessary? Another style/formatting thing that depends on opensource.com style, which I don't know.
• Page 27, final paragraph, bulleted list: I'm not certain about the punctuation here. Are the quotation marks needed? And do you want to include the en dash as well?
• Page 28, second bullet: Red Hat doesn't capitalize job titles, so I'd be inclined to lower case project manager.
• Page 28, quote above Step 2: Since it's a block quote, are quotation marks necessary?
• Page 28, quote above Step 2: I'm not certain what's meant by "this potential revenue gain". However, it's a hypothetical serving as an example of a quote, so that reference may not need to be crystal clear.
• Page 28, final bullet: How about "How many clicks must users make from when they begin shopping to when they complete their (or a) purchase" instead? Doing so keeps things parallel with the use of "they" early in the question and makes it more active
• Page 29, first bullet: Does "NA" stand for "North American" here? Also, it's awkward having "non-NA" and "not seeing" on top of one another. Maybe reword the question to eliminate that problem?
• Page 29, fourth bullet: AP and Red Hat call for a hyphen in "on-site".
• Page 29, sixth bullet: Similar to what I mentioned above, how about "Do we understand the customer journey for ordering women's apparel online and how much time each step in the journey takes" instead?
• Page 29, first paragraph under Step 3: How about "For example, how many clicks do users typically make between the moment they start shopping and the time they complete a purchase" instead?
• Page 29, first paragraph under Step 3, final line: It's the return of the exclamation point.
• Page 29-30, bulleted list:
  • I'm not certain I understand what the first part of each bullet means. A number of symbols were used, and I'd really prefer words.
  • Also, this list begins with a phrase in italics followed by a colon. Other lists later in the chapter use bold, all-caps. It would be nice to be consistent across all lists (as much as possible).
  • How about "How many clicks are needed from when someone starts shopping to when they complete a purchase" instead for the second bullet?
• Page 30, first full paragraph: The last sentence seems off. How about changing "... on average times users ..." to "... on the average time users ..."?
• Page 30, bulleted list: See earlier comment about inconsistent formats across the bulleted lists.
• Page 31, final bullet in first bulleted list: Our friend the exclamation point is back.
• Page 31, second bulleted list: See earlier comment about consistency in formatting.
• Page 32, first bullet: The comma after "advertisement" isn't necessary.
• Page 32, first bullet, final sentence: I think there's a word missing in that sentence. See "if users that link".
• Page 32, second bullet: You may or may not need a comma after "artifact". It's hard to tell given the formatting for the beginning of each bullet in that list.
• Page 32, second bullet: Please insert a hyphen so it's "3-minute". Also, make certain we're consistent in whether we spell out the number based on whatever you decided for the other chapter by this same author that I sent earlier today.
• Page 32, third bullet: Why italics within the first sentence?
• Page 33, bulleted lists: See previous comments about consistency in formatting for bulleted lists.
• Page 34, first bullet: Please insert a period at the end of this bullet.
• Page 34, final paragraph: The exclamation point returns.
• Page 34, final line: Please insert a comma after "adjust".