Please, describe your dream github bot

For a github bot, I'd like it:

To be up to date with all that github supports.
To use, or be able to use, all features.
To have great, opinionated defaults.
To be polite, and try to not impose on users who dislike bots.
To avoid littering.
To be succinct.
To be extendable.
To be able to activate agents, jobs, actions, etc. and report back with results.
To feel like part of the team.
To help celebrate small wins and add gratification for contributors.
To act as an ambassador for the repo (and "project") and help create a good first impression.

these-are-the / github-bots-youre-looking-for