tianyuan
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2 months ago 一些要"战胜“Boredom的鸡汤 - 《atomic habits》
作者真的是废话大王，这些cliché的话真的听到吐了。🤮
“What’s the difference between the best athletes and everyone else?” I asked. “What do the really successful people do that most don’t?” He mentioned the factors you might expect: genetics, luck, talent. But then he said something I wasn’t expecting: “At some point it comes down to who can handle the boredom of training every day, doing the same lifts over and over and over.”
But this coach was saying that really successful people feel the same lack of motivation as everyone else. The difference is that they still find a way to show up despite the feelings of boredom.
Mastery requires practice. But the more you practice something, the more boring and routine it becomes
The greatest threat to success is not failure but boredom. We get bored with habits because they stop delighting us. The outcome becomes expected. And as our habits become ordinary, we start derailing our progress to seek novelty. Perhaps this is why we get caught up in a never-ending cycle, jumping from one workout to the next, one diet to the next, one business idea to the next. As soon as we experience the slightest dip in motivation, we begin seeking a new strategy—even if the old one was still working. As Machiavelli noted, “Men desire novelty to such an extent that those who are doing well wish for a change as much as those who are doing badly.
When a habit is truly important to you, you have to be willing to stick to it in any mood
At some point, everyone faces the same challenge on the journey of selfimprovement: you have to fall in love with boredom
The only way to become excellent is to be endlessly fascinated by doing the same thing over and over. You have to fall in love with boredom
我读过的四本关于习惯养成的书籍
Atomic Habits by James Clear: James Clear's groundbreaking book illustrates how minor adjustments can have a major impact, helping individuals build beneficial habits and eliminate negative ones.
Mini Habits: Smaller Habits, Bigger Results by Stephen Guise: Stephen Guise introduces a revolutionary approach to developing lifelong habits through small, manageable actions that ensure success.
The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg: Charles Duhigg explores the science of habits, explaining how they are formed, how they influence our behavior, and how they can be transformed to enact positive change in our lives.
The Practicing Mind by Thomas M. Sterner: Gain insights into developing focus and discipline to master any skill or challenge by embracing the process and staying present.
先说结论
一些行动和成果 (20240414)
我的想法与摘抄
几年前读过这本书，简单说一下书中重要的观点以及自己尝试后的感悟。
Atomic Habits 有一章强调环境对于习惯养成的重要性。建议大家去创造环境，从而让自己更容易产生cue. 执行层面：我开始经常去lab，或者图书馆等有学习氛围的地方，避免一个人呆久了，容易倦怠，效果很好，也有新鲜感。副作用是，我又开始花额外的精力去琢磨文具和生产力工具（所谓创造一个更舒适，更喜欢的环境). 做事情，如果能获得内驱力（internalize your motivation)， 远远比外驱力（环境，名声，成就，reputation, 金钱） 效果要好，而且持久。但是没有内驱力的情况下，用外驱的效果结果就是效果不稳定. 一通折腾下来， “环境”这个factor在我这儿，也就一半一半吧，sometimes work, sometimes doesn't.
habit tracker 我也用过，有小部分坚持了下来（感受到了compound benefits), 大部分坚持不了1周就放弃了。有段时间家里满墙都贴着各种habit tracker (A4纸）, 也用app。坚持下来的习惯是背韩语单词，现在也积累了至少1000词汇了, 每天5-10分钟，不累，现在还会复习巩固。没坚持下来的就很多，我当时设置了太多的习惯（人啊，就是贪心）。如果让我重来，我可能设置不超过3个习惯，然后每个坚持20天，大概率就会固定下来。
习惯养成之“动力说”
我想就动力说一说, 算是对我启发比较大的点。
Atomic的作者说到：
充满着一股子鸡汤味，哈哈。要爱上无聊？！一种特别需要你使用动力的感觉。但是动力这东西，岂是说有就有的？！我这种凡夫俗子是没法“爱上”无聊的。而且“无聊”，本来就是一种情绪和judgement. 但是，真正的习惯是带有情绪的吗？我觉得大部分习惯是比较无意识也没有什么情绪的行为，你问我刷牙有啥feel? 用牙线有啥feel？洗脸有啥feel？ 我做这些就没feel，我不会说，我觉得无聊，当然也不会觉得激动开心或者振奋人心。所以我的第一个疑问就是, 对于那些已经在长期坚持的习惯，其实人是不太带情绪的，如果还要用“战胜”，“爱上”，“忍受”这样的词来形容习惯养成后的重复行为，总觉得有点站不住脚。而且习惯本身应该是一些下意识的行为，而不是需要大量情绪来驱动的。明明是巴普洛夫的狗，非要把自己说成热血漫的主角。
关于习惯养成的“动力”，以及很难坚持习惯的这种困境，我更喜欢微习惯和练习的心态里面的讨论和方法（个别章节对我很受用，也不是每个章节都喜欢)。
首先是微习惯的作者驳斥“动力”说，作者认为“动力是好东西，但是它不可靠”：
相对于动力，作者认为意志力更可靠，而且可训练，关于意志力，我不再缀诉。作者推荐的微习惯的本质是，你要设定的目标足够小，小到它几乎不会让你在还没做的时候就感到困难，小到不可能失败，小到不会让你产生任何抵触情绪. 比如做一个俯卧撑，写30个字，阅读1页书。
关于《练习的心态》，作者更多的讨论了如何调节情绪, 动力和心流。更多是探讨你对很多事情的预判会影响你行动，过于担心没发生的事情，你可能需要冥想来管理自己的思绪和情绪，能够从旁观者视角观察自己的情绪。我有72条笔记，我就不放了，感兴趣可以翻翻书，1-2个小时应该可以很快翻完，这种书也不用太细看。