Hey Adam, I really like what you wrote so far. Starting off with an advantage to living off the grid will probably make people more receptive to the idea of changing their energy consumption habits. Most Floridians will also find the memory of "hurricane days" to be quite relatable. I know I do. When you transitioned to the second part, I became a little confused though. I thought Pat was still narrating and that I was reading a first-person account of his early life experience. I don't know how you could make that transition smoother, but I don't think it's clear to the reader that you're talking about your own experience at that point. Maybe you can begin the story through your perspective then transition to Pat? Just a suggestion. As for the outline, I think everything sounds good, and I can't wait to see what you come up with. I hope everything goes well at Finca Mycol tomorrow!
Hey Adam, I really like what you wrote so far. Starting off with an advantage to living off the grid will probably make people more receptive to the idea of changing their energy consumption habits. Most Floridians will also find the memory of "hurricane days" to be quite relatable. I know I do. When you transitioned to the second part, I became a little confused though. I thought Pat was still narrating and that I was reading a first-person account of his early life experience. I don't know how you could make that transition smoother, but I don't think it's clear to the reader that you're talking about your own experience at that point. Maybe you can begin the story through your perspective then transition to Pat? Just a suggestion. As for the outline, I think everything sounds good, and I can't wait to see what you come up with. I hope everything goes well at Finca Mycol tomorrow!