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Editorial suggestion for RAUR pre-WD => Note #128

Closed RealJoshue108 closed 3 years ago

RealJoshue108 commented 3 years ago

New comments - thanks @scotthollier

Abstract: great, no issue.

Introduction:

I’d like to see the ‘what is RTC? Reworked. Here’s how it stands:

What is Real-time communication (RTC)?

The traditional data exchange model is client to server. Real-time communication (RTC) is game-changing as it is enabled in part by specifications like WebRTC that provides real-time peer to peer audio, video and data exchange directly between supported user agents. This enables instantaneous applications for video and audio calls, text chat, file exchange, screen sharing and gaming, all without the need for browser plugins. However, WebRTC is not the sole specification with responsibility to enable accessible real-time communications, as use cases and requirements are broad - as outlined in the IETF RFC 7478 'Web Real-Time Communication Use Cases and Requirements' document. [ietf-rtc]

If the reader wants to know what RTC is, it currently requires a bit of digging through the text. I’d like to see the first sentence as ‘RTC is…’  then a clear a definition in response to the heading ‘What is RTC?’ and then go onto explain the relevance of WebRTC, game-changer, etc.  
RTC accessibility: great. This is a good example of how the definition is more clear
User needs definition: similar to first comment. Currently reads as:

---.

2 User needs definition

This document outlines various accessibility related user needs for Accessible RTC. These user needs should drive accessibility requirements for Accessible RTC and its related architecture.

User needs are presented here with their related requirements; some in a range of scenarios (which can be thought of as similar to user stories). User needs and requirements are being actively reviewing by RQTF/APA.

Again given the section is called ‘user needs’ definition’, it’d be good to start with ‘A user need is…’ and explain it, then go onto the rest of the text. At the moment it talks about user needs but in my opinion doesn’t define it.
RealJoshue108 commented 3 years ago

These suggested changes have been added to the editors draft http://raw.githack.com/w3c/apa/2021-jan-raur/raur/index.html