Quote: "I often miss items on sale because it is hard for me to spot the red labels used to show those things. Sometimes filling out the shopping cart forms is tricky because if I leave something out they show it in red and it’s hard for me to see it."
Suggestion to replace "things" and make the problem more clear, as follows:
"I often miss items on sale because it is hard for me to spot the red labels used to indicate them. Sometimes filling out the shopping cart form is tricky because if I overlook a field, I get an error or warning message in red and it’s hard for me to see the message".
(Just a suggestion, no strong feelings."
Next paragraph, second sentence:
Current: "Lee was born with deuteranopia and protanopia (often called “color blindness”). He has difficulty distinguishing among items that are red, green, orange, and brown, all of which appear kind of a murky brown."
Suggestion to change "all of which appear kind of a murky brown" to "all of which appear to him as a kind of murky brown"
Typo:
"He’s noticed lately" should be "He noticed lately" (remove apostrophe 's').
Typo:
"Lee plays in a various fantasy football leagues" should be "Lee plays in various fantasy football leagues." (remove "a" before "various").
mpalmersg
commented
2 years ago
From survey