feat: draft process page

[srizvi]

• these are the steps: https://sambi.dev/#process
• this is the content to be updated: https://sambi.dev/process
• the current draft content is on tone, roll with it
• also need appropriate bg images that help reinforce the copy

Figure out who's going to work on what, create new issues or subtasks as needed. Update assignees accordingly.

[rradice13]

@srizvi @ambi-dar

Gave the first draft a pass. Tried to stick with the tone in the current draft, following the feel of our About and FAQ. I have to admit, this style of writing is a lot of fun... fun not taking ourselves too seriously.

Also tried to keep the flow between steps 1-4 consistent - moving them down the page. Wrote in f pattern, readability is 6-8 so could be improved, 92 characters'ish, still need to do tags/categories for each (e.g. blood samples) :)

Let me know if I got close.

Discovery & assimilation

We'll sneak into your digital world like squirrels on a forgotten bird feeder—enthusiastic, slightly messy, and probably leaving with more than we intended.

Expect weird questions and fake smiles. We'll use big words to dig into everything from your website to your acquisition strategy. Cause snooping is our jam.

The more you tell us, the better we can hide our confusion. And the more creative our excuses sound when things get… interesting. By the end? We'll deliver a plan (and a bill). Don't worry, the budget will be just as surprising as our strategy!

Planning & definition

Based on our suspiciously thorough "discovery" notes, we'll craft a roadmap that looks impressive on paper. In reality, it's our best guess at turning your vague ideas into something vaguely resembling what you asked for.

We’ll talk about "synergy" and "growth hacking" (even though we might have to Google those later). The more impressive our charts and graphs look, the less likely you are to notice we're winging it.

And hey, if things start to look questionable, we'll claim it's a "bold, disruptive strategy.” No one understands what that means anyway.

Build & execute

We'll roll up our sleeves and get to work (after figuring out which sleeves even have buttons). You’ll likely see frantic keyboard tapping and panicked searches for "how to fix [insert disastrous mishap]." If you're lucky, you'll even catch the occasional muttered curse word as things go sideways.

Think of us as slightly less-competent construction workers trying to build a house entirely from IKEA instructions... while the instructions are in Swedish.

Sure, it might be a bumpy ride, but we're committed to getting you something that sorta makes you smile. (and doesn't completely collapse when you look at it too hard)

Analyze, improve, & scale

We'll squint at dashboards full of numbers, desperately searching for insights. (while silently wishing we'd paid more attention in math class)

Don't be fooled by words like "data-driven" and "validate." We're basically making educated guesses and hoping you can't tell the difference.

Expect random tweaks, cleverly disguised as "strategic experiments.” It's a whole lotta trial and error (mostly error). And if anyone asks about scaling? We'll offer a reassuring smile. Meanwhile, we're secretly hoping your sudden growth spurt looks like the magic we "planned."

[rradice13]

Updated processes sections 2-4 backing off on the humor and leaning into the overuse of big fancy words (used your Intera slides to better align deliverables). I moved some of what you had in discovery to step 2.

2. Planning & definition

Based on our suspiciously thorough discovery notes, we'll craft a roadmap that looks impressive – the perfect prop for your next investor pitch.

We'll get to know your company better than you do (which, let's be honest, isn't exactly a high bar). Think of it as a rigorous exploration of your people, process, and technology.

We'll dissect your business with the finesse of an overly enthusiastic intern. Fancy terms like Outcome-Driven Innovation (ODI) will be our guide. All of this will culminate in a realistic(ish) plan of your current, needed, and future capabilities – giddy-up!

3. Build & execute

Now, on to that magnificent roadmap! Imagine it as a series of blueprints so detailed and full of lofty ideas to experiment with, it'll make your head spin. We'll follow it like slightly less-competent construction workers trying to build a house entirely from IKEA instructions.

Sure, it might be chaotic, but our unwavering commitment to execution will delight (or possibly overwhelm) you. We'll ruthlessly prioritize, following our list of experiments, validation criteria, and acceptance metrics... until we get distracted by something shiny.

The silver lining? We'll have a color-coded spreadsheet to document our journey, including plans to implement across organizational perspectives. And that is a truly beautiful thing!

4. Analyze, improve, & scale

We'll dive into your data, analyzing KPIs and metrics. All in a ruthless pursuit of actionable insights. Don't let terms like data-driven optimization and iterative validation fool you. These are ways of saying we'll keep refining until we achieve tangible results.

We'll leverage insights to optimize conversion funnels, enhance customer acquisition, and boost core engagement metrics. If anyone asks about scaling? We'll mention optimization, customer segmentation, personalized experience, and drop-off points.

The ultimate goal? We'll follow a well-laid-out growth plan that’s proactive, personalized, and ready to fuel your bottom line.